MW2 knifing system explained, by Sajam

First and foremost thank you for reading the explanation of the Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2 knifing system! I will explain the inter workings of the rather complex, but completely f***ing broken knife ability! To start, how the knife works:

Firstly, it doesn't. I mean, not for you. The person that kills you with it, lunges from about 15 feet away. Your pathetic and rubber knife only works at 3 millimeters. That's on a good day, when the knife actually does kill people. You may be wondering, "Why does the knife lunge for some but not for others?" The answer? shlong size.

Yes, shlong size. The larger the shlong of the person being knifed, the farther the lunge will be. By carefully studying the game and the lunging system I have discovered the true workings of the knife system. What data do I have to support this? I have had people knife me from farther then any gun will shoot in the game. xxxkillery7xxx, 11 year old squeaker can't even be harmed by the knife unless you catch him not moving, which never happens because he is 11 and hopped up on Mountain Dew.

So now that you know how the knifing system works, how do you apply it to gameplay? For one, you can know figure out the slong size of every one on MW2! That's right, you can find out if their winky is the size of your pinky! If your getting destroyed by some guy in a game, knife him and bring him to shame! You can also have a reason to why your knife never works. Tiny shlong sizes of the people on the other team.

So the next time your get screwed over in MW2 by the knife, just remember: You have a giant slong!

*credits go to Sajam for discovering knife system properties*

OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH! It all makes sense now!

Wait... would Viagra count as a mod then?

OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHH! It all makes sense now!

Wait... would Viagra count as a mod then?

Only against you!

That would increase the range of lunges against you!

My mind is blown.

The knifing system in Bad Company 2 is broken as well. I can knife someone, watch the animation, hear the penetration, and have him turn around and shoot/knife me. Though I have no complaints about the game in general, it's just that it's one of the things that pisses me off about it. Kind of like the lag in Gears or, I dunno, I can't think of anything else about MW2 that I don't like, other than the inconsistency of my scores from game to game.

The knifing system in Bad Company 2 is broken as well. I can knife someone, watch the animation, hear the penetration, and have him turn around and shoot/knife me. Though I have no complaints about the game in general, it's just that it's one of the things that pisses me off about it. Kind of like the lag in Gears or, I dunno, I can't think of anything else about MW2 that I don't like, other than the inconsistency of my scores from game to game.

They messed up the knifing with the weapons update they did a few days ago on BC2. You now have to be on top of someone to knife them which is quite annoying. Oh, and you can't knife someone while running behind them anymore because the lunge is gone.

******* lol'd. That was amazing.

ahhh...thats the reason i get screwed when i go to knife someone....lmao thanks for showing us the light

Oh, and here i thought my ability to knife from a mile away was just skill

Oh, and here i thought my ability to knife from a mile away was just skill

Maybe your finding large **** lobbys?